First/Third Wednesdays of the month:
The Hump D’ Hash meets for a pick-up hash and/or happy hour (Hump D’ is short for hump day – as in Wednesday… get it?). We tend to run 3-6 miles from different bars every week, picking hares at the start to lay trail. The Hump D’ is a casual affair, with very little “religion” aka: circle to speak of and usually no BNs on trail. After the Hump D’ ends, we hang out for drinks and/or dinner at the meeting location, so if you show up late just hang around, we’ll be back in an hour or two.
Note: We ask for $1 to cover the cost of chalk, flour and random gimmies.
The Hump D’ starts at various times depending on the season, but a good rule of thumb is 6:36 in the Fall/Winter and as late as 6:54 in the spring/summer. We encourage you to always bring a whistle and a flashlight. In the warmer months a shirt to change into after is nice and in the colder months, warm clothing.
If you are coming in from out of town or if you’re new to the group and want to meet up with us on a Wednesday, we encourage you to send an email to the Phoenix HHH mismanagement and we’ll be sure to keep an eye out for you.
Hump History – Everything you never cared about and more!
By Ima Luuuger (L)
Prior to the founding of the Hump d’ Hash, the Phoenix Hash House Harriers would meet and drink every Wednesday at The Monastery around 26th St and Indian School. A few hardy overachievers, chief among them 3IY and Sphinxter Swallows, would come early and run around 6 miles for no apparent reason. This was about the time when I started with the hash. To that point, I had never ran much and the thought of running a 10k was completely outside of any desire I had. I kept with it and the first time I ever ran a full 10k was along these old warriors, champions of the hash and masters of beer.
Eventually, The Monastery was sold off to soulless, beer-hating developer types who were going to turn the location into “corporate business condos”. This broke many a heart and I hared my very first contra, the “ Funky Monk’ey Hash to commemorate the loss of our favorite watering hole. The search was on to find our new spot, and the hash looked far and wide with a vengeance to find a place worthy of us. Bareback was instrumental in issuing ballots, tally votes and generally keeping track of all the shitholes we visited. After months of new bars, it was decided we would visit the 4 highest voted bars every month, with Hazelwood’s as the location of our monthly Mis-Management meeting.
All was well, except the spell was broken. Attendance dropped from low to me and my now dead dog Max in a matter of weeks. Tears were shed bitterly into my beer. Which did not need the salt. And Max called me a pussy. Desperate for some hasher love, I formulated a plan. I would create a Wednesday night hash that would take all the best stuff from those halcyon days at The Monastery and get people drinking and running (in that order) again on Wednesdays! With the blessing of Mis-Management, (I truly don’t think they were sober enough to make a decision, but whatever) I courageously started the Hump d’ Hash on February 22, 2006 at Flicka’s Cantina in Scottsdale (The spiritual home of the Hump). Wanting to do as little work as possible, it occurred to me that I needed suckers, helpers. Heiferfearzen and Allofher Fist seemed gullible enough, and were quickly enlisted.
In my head(!) there were just a few guiding principles:
- Cheap! Humps would cost minimal money. $1 sounded good.
- Fast! Humps would rarely incorporate RELIGION so people could get home before 10pm.
- Educational! Humps would be hared by someone picked on the spot so that even virgins and new-boots could try haring without the pressure of a big scary Saturday Hash.
- Traditional! Humps would rarely have beer stops. A-A, we would drink/eat before and after but follow traditional Hash trails in between.
The Hump caught on and started developing a following of new hashers who had never attended a Saturday Hash. We had growing pains as these new hashers, many of which were accomplished runners, started bleeding into the Full Moon Hash and Saturdays and changed the speed and flavor of the hash. For a while, the Hash became a much speedier affair and there were many grumblings from some of the older veteran hashers (as older veteran hashers are wont to do). Eventually however, these new hashers became old hashers , we all learned to love each other and peace was restored to the cosmos.
In late 2007, Allofher was ready to pass the torch of Head(!)Master to a new hasher, Happy Birthday, Fuck You!!! A year later in November 2008, I opened SideBar (finally), and my time was severely limited. It was time for two hashers to join the Head(!)Master club, My Clit Talks and Total Flamer, with HBFU taking on the overall hump mismanagement. In the September of 2010, Donkey Dildo Delight joined the team since Flamer was always too damn busy wanking working.
March 2011, Heiferfearzen finally threw in the towel (why did he have a towel?) and the whole mess was passed onto a new sucker, Head(!)Master: Hole Miner’s Daughter. Donkey Dildo Delight and My Clit Talks stuck around because they couldn’t find anyone to take their place.
Ever wondered about the damned numbering system I designed? Well, let’s break it down. Let’s say this Hump is #6.9.181. The first # is the year of the Hump. We started with 1.1.1 so this is the 6th year. The second # is Humps this year, that means this is the 9th Hump this year. And the final # is total Humps ever. 181. OK!
Oh and those soulless, beer-hating developer types? They are still sitting on an empty piece of land. Stick that in your beer and cry, bastards!
Founding Hump d’ Hash Head(!)Master Ima Luuuger (L) – 3/31/11