Run #664 - It's the first ever "Breakfast Potatoes for Dinner Smackdown Hash!"
And you thought you'd heard it all. Not even close!
Date: Saturday, October 25th, 2008
Start: 6pm (bring a flashlight); Hares away: Shortly after
Hare(s): Bitch 'N Hoe & Anal Beads
Hash Cash: $5
Location: Tortoise Coitus' house in Ahwatukee - 2901 E. Redwood Lane, Phoenix (Thomas Guide page 819) (Don't ask me... I don't know what Thomas Guide is either.... or who Thomas is)
Di-erections:
- -From I-10, take the Chandler Boulevard Exit, and go West about 2 1/2 miles
- -Turn LEFT at the light onto S. 32nd Street, and go about 3/4 of a mile
- -Turn RIGHT onto E. Liberty Lane, and go about 1/4 mile
- -Turn LEFT onto S. 29th Place - NOT S. 29th Way, which is first
- -Follow the corner around to Redwood, and the house will be a few down on the LEFT side of the street
On After: at Tortoise's house, so BRING YOUR OWN BEER for the on after as well as SOMETHING TO THROW ON THE GRILL
Other Deets:
- -This will be a dead hare trail. While everyone is out on trail, Anal Beads and I will be whipping up our world famous breakfast potatoes.
- -When ya'll get back, we will have put all your names into a beer mug, and will pull out five random names to be impartial judges. Judging will be a blind taste test.
- -And yes, the rest of you can have some potatoes too. For that reason, even though it's not hashworthy, PLEASE R.S.V.P. so we know how many potatoes to make.
- -In the event that Bitch 'N Hoe wins, Anal Beads will have to go to a Happy Hour in a dress of Bitch's choosing, and probably wearing her shoes - which, sadly, he'll probably fit in to.
- -In the event that Anal Beads wins, Bitch 'N Hoe will have to eat a plate of her own breakfast potatoes smothered in catsup. EWWWWWWWW!
Two things have led to this event taking place:
A) Anal Beads can't make breakfast potatoes for shit, but still thinks he can't beat Bitch 'N Hoe's World Famous We Don't NEED No Stinkin' Catsup Recipe. He, of course, will allow catsup on his. LOSER! So, in the Tradition of Iron Chef America and Throwdown with Bobby Flay (ya gotta LOVE the Food Network), we're havin' a smackdown, and ya'll are invited.
B) Ima Luuuger has been planning to do a Dia de los Muertos (that would be Day of the Dead for you gringos) Hash* on November 1st for about 69 months now, and thought it would be super splendid if that run would be numbered 666! In order to do that, we need to have one additional numbered Phoenix Hash before then. So - in the grand Tradition of hash math, and an attitude of "We do what it takes to get it done," we're having this extra hash!
* There is actually a holiday in Mexico celebrated on November 1st and 2nd called Dia de los Muertos for honoring the dearly departed. It also happens to coincide with the Catholic holidays of All Saints Day and All Souls Day, which are celebrated on those days as well.
But I digress. This is really all about the potatoes!
More details will follow, but if I did this correctly, it will be Official Phoenix Hash # 664, and we will hold it on October 25th. So, mark your calendars now!
As for you, Anal Beads, all I gotta say is - Bring it, bitch! Oh, wait. That's my name........
I think that's it. As always, if anyone has any questions, give me (Bitch 'N Hoe) a buzz at 480-370-3440 or email me at the_bnh@yahoo.com.